HELP! I don't know how to move on!

1. Cry and cry until you die
HAHAHAHA KIDDING! Well, crying is indeed the effective way to let all the pain out. This is the first step in moving on. Crying helps you reduce the pain somehow but it doesn't mean that when you cry everything's gonna go back to its normal state.

2. Talk to your besties or to yourself
If you're uncomfortable opening up your story to your friends you can just talk to yourself. I know it sounds weird and insane but this will actually help you to slowly understand yourself and the situation you are going through. Trust me, speaking out your feelings to someone or to yourself will work.

3.Stalk him
I know that this tip is kinda negative but I'm pretty sure everyone's stalking their ex'es after break up so go ahead gurl! Just be careful cause you might hit the like button. Hahaha. But after stalking him for two to three days, you SHOULD STOP! Refrain from using you accounts even your phone. I suggest to put your phone into airplane mode or just let your friend hide your phone.HAHAHAHA! Does it make any sense?

4. EAT, SLEEP, REPEAT
The basic steps in moving on. It's okay. You can just do these two for the rest of the week but always remember that you should not let these steps eat you for a very long time.

5. Read books or listen to music
Read. Read. Read. If you're not enjoying books you can turn on your phone and speakers and just listen to your faves. It's okay to listen to your "theme songs" or to his favorite songs. It's part of moving on. You cannot just hide those songs or delete those just because it reminds you of all the memories that you had. Imagine this, if you're not used to hear those theme songs you had then you were in a coffee shop or in a restaurant then this certain song plays. So.... there you are teary eyed because you remember all of your mem'ries with him. Unlike when you're used to it, you'll be alright when you hear it.

6. Write!! 
Compose poems, short stories, songs or just write on your journal everything!! Every heartaches, every pain. It's okay even if you messed up your hand writing or even if the ink smudge. It's more dramatic though. Hahahaha. But seriously, you can write "30 days of moving on" or any shit that you want to write about him. This could also be an alternative on step number 2.

7. Watch movies or series 
Turn on your TV or your lappy. Go watch your fave movies or discover new series. Watch 'til 4AM or whatever. You can go with Nicholas Sparks love stories and cry in every scene that you picture yourself and your ex boyfriend. Or just cry just because you missed all the memories. It doesn't matter how many tissue rolls you used.

If only you love her

I wonder why do people fall in love? How can people easily say those words, "I love you". Are they aware on the true meaning of love? Do they know the consequences when they give their heart to someone else? Why do people easily give their heart and soul to someone?

Sometimes I just sit back and stay in a peaceful coffee shop wondering how people can carry all the responsibilities of loving someone. Actually for me, it is really hard to love someone especially when you can't love yourself in the first place. How can you love a girl when all she thinks about are her insecurities? How can you deal with all of her shitty thoughts about life? Can you even look at her and just simply smile because you know deep down in your heart that "Damn i really love this girl".

Don't tell a girl you love her when you can't wait to take her virginity. Don't ever tell a girl you love her when you can't stand by her side everytime she's having a hard time to choose where to eat, what make up to buy or which dress looks better on her. Don't tell a girl you love her when you are not ready to hear her complains in life. Don't tell a girl you love her if you can't remind her how beautiful she is every morning. Don't tell a girl you love her if you never seen her cry. Don't tell a girl you love her if you're not ready to listen to her never ending dramas. Don't tell a girl you love her if you're not ready to hold her hand when she's frightened. Don't tell a girl you love her if you're not ready to see her wounds and scars. Lastly, don't tell a girl you love her if can't love her imperfections.

♥,

J

(photo not mine)

Just maybe

Maybe he isn't interested to know you more
Maybe he isn't capable to make you happy
Maybe he doesn't accept you for who you are
Maybe he doesn't see you as someone that should be treated as a princess
Maybe he can't tell you how beautiful you are when you smile
Maybe he doesn't appreciate all the little things you do for him
Maybe he doesn't care too much about you
Maybe he isn't making efforts to let you stay
Maybe he can't set his priorities straight
Maybe he isn't prepared to take responsibilities
Maybe he can't picture you walking down the aisle
Maybe he can't see you as a mother of his child
Maybe he can't include you in his plans and goals in life
Maybe he can't be a responsible partner
Maybe he can't clarify to himself what true love means
Maybe he can't love himself as much as you love him
Maybe he isn't tired, he just want to take a rest
Maybe he can't lie to himself telling you that he loves you
Maybe when he says I love you he can't look into your eyes
Maybe he was just too afraid knowing that you can do anything for him while he cannot
Maybe he doesn't love you in a way that you wanted him to love you
Maybe he just fall out of love
Lastly, maybe he isn't the one

♥,

J

(photo not mine)

Brilliante Mendoza: Taklub (Trap)

I've been a huge fan of independent films ever since I study Communication. We've done a lot of film analysis and such. I was forced to watch films that's not my type and later on identify such parts and analyze it. At first I was like "How am I going to watch this movie? I can't even understand the story. I'm not interested in this genre!" Yeah, stuff like that. But I realized that I should embrace all genres and I shouldn't limit myself for watching films that only suits my interest. Honestly, I'm more into local movies than international ones because I believe that I, we, should appreciate our very own masterpiece. These days, indie films are creating a huge impact among the audience because mainstream films are becoming off the interest of some viewers. Personally, there are few mainstream films that I consider as a good one. Unlike indie films, it seems to be great all the time although my knowledge about indie films are not that much. I've watched few indie films in television and I'm wanting to watch film festivals like Cinemalaya and Sinag Maynila but I always ended up not attending any of those festivals. And I don't know why.

Last February 12, a film appreciation workshop with Brilliante Mendoza was held at cinema 2 in SM Bacoor. At first we watched one of his award winning film which is Taklub (Trap) starring Nora Aunor, Julio Diaz, Aaron Rivera, Lou Veloso and many more. The film focus on three different people (Bebeth, Larry, Erwin) with three different stories after supertyphoon Yolanda (Haiyan) hit the city of Tacloban. The film revolves around the three characters narrating their life after the supertyphoon and their grief for the lost of their family members. Bebeth (Nora Aunor) who's been looking for her three children whose not confirmed if their still alive or not. She's just hoping for the DNA results that turned out negative at the end. Larry (Julio Diaz) who's wife died in the typhoon just focus on his devotion by carrying a life-size cross and roaming around the city. Erwin (Aaron Rivera) trying his best to give his brother and sister a good life. He then hide to his sister that their parents died due to the supertyphoon.

Tis the season to spread the love!

It's the most sweetest time of the year! ♥ I bet everyone became busy before this day comes. Girls and especially boys became active planning for their surprises to their loved ones. Creating love letters, buying chocolates, decorating some cute stuff, spreading petals at the floor with matching candles and balloons and of course bouquet of flowers and giant teddy bear every girl wants!! (Yeah. I want that too but I'm more into letters than bears. I think?) Okay, those things I mentioned are cute. That's the typical celebration of Valentines day among the youth today.  When I was a little younger I used to see Valentines as a day for extravagant surprises and "buwis-buhay" efforts. For now, I'm more into formal dates in a hotel or restaurant or just an out of town. I also feel loved and special with just a simple rose and a love letter. I used to be a fan of bouquet of flowers, everytime i see them I'm like "Uhh. That is so sweet!"But now, one rose is enough for me. Hahahaha! ☺ As long as I'm with the most special persons in my life in a serene and peaceful place, I am completely happy.

Today is February 14, we all have different ways to celebrate this day. We all have different beliefs and perspectives on how are we going to make this day extra special with our loved ones. Let's just spread the love sweeties! Happy Heart's Day everyone! Hope you had a great time with your family, friends and special someone!

♥,

J

(Photo not mine)

Ain't number one

How to be number one? I'm pretty sure everyone's goal is to be the number one, to be at the top in various fields that we are taking.

I've been known in our class for being one of the competitive student. Well sometimes I get annoyed when they keep on teasing me for being competitive because I'm not really aiming to compete with them. I'm just doing my job to pass a certain subject. They always see me being prepared and organized everytime the class is about to start. Actually, I AM NOT. I am just a regular student coming in class without any preparations. I am just a normal student who can't understand the lessons. I am just a typical student who's failing in quizzes and exams. Just like you. Just like every student.

To tell you honestly, I want to be on top. I want my name to be posted as one of the Dean's Lister. But I know I can't. I am not as intelligent as our batch's top one, two, three. I just passed exams, quizzes, activities and such because I am completely and absolutely studying and memorizing the lectures on my notebook and hand outs. If I will not study, I will fail. That's why I admire those students for passing their subjects without giving full effort to study their lessons. You know, "matalino talaga".

Now I realized, it's not about being the number one. It's not about being the highest in exams. It's not about having grades that is 90 and above. It's not just about the grades. You know you're number one when you achieve something that you didn't expect. You've always been number one. You do not have to compete with others. You do not have to let everyone know that you belong to a star section or Dean's Lister. You don't need anyone for any validation that you're on the top. You're already number one. Believe in yourself. You are the best.

♥,

J

(photo not mine)

I'll spread my wings soon

It's been a tough battle to all of us. I know I'm not the only one who's thinking about how our future will turn out. I'm not the only one who's planning for work after graduation. We all have plans and goals in life. We all dreamt for a better life, for a perfect life. But how are we going to achieve all of these? As a student, I experienced a lot of rejections, failures, comparisons, and such. My work was been criticized and reprehended. I may sometimes can't answer directly to the professors questions. I always feel the tension every time our terror professor is about to enter the room. My body is always shaking and my voice stutters when I speak. My skin color turns pale. Just like the normal students who's incapable of facing their fears. Honestly the level of my confidence is too low. I know deep down in myself that I got something to say but I'm afraid to be judge by others. Well, that's the main problem of everyone all the time. I don't know how to boost my confidence. I mean, I am confident at times but I'm not consistent.

Now, I realized, what am I doing to myself? Why am I not doing anything that I can be proud of in the future? Why am I settling for this kind of "life"? They always say that " THE CHANGE STARTS IN YOU". So what now? I have plans. I can already see myself in the next 8 years. I can see my perfect life. But I don't know how to go further. I don't know what else should I risk to be someone that is capable of saying YES all the time.

♥,

J

(photo not mine)

Maestro Fedeli Cafe

Coffee shops is one of the in demand business in today's century. This is one of the successful business anyone can have. Aside from it is easy to put up such business, especially when you have the enough amount of capital, it is also known for being one of the business that encounter less bankruptcy. Having this kind of business is at first hard to establish and maintain a name. It is challenging to stand out in one city if there's more than five coffee shops nearby. Competing with different coffee shops with various specialties is indeed a challenge to every businessman. Even though there are lots of similarities, costumers are ready to try and explore different tastes of coffee and pastries.

Maestro Fedeli Cafe is one of the known coffee shop in Laguna (Biñan and Pacita). Students around the city loves to stay and relax in this classy and homey shop. This place is best when you're planning to have a mini reunion with your high school or college buddies. Aside from that, students who loved to do research, homeworks or group studies prefer to occupy this shop.

Have you ever wonder why they came up with such name for their coffee shop? "Faithful Masters" is the meaning of Maestro Fedeli. These words derived from the Bible since the owners are said to be religious. There are parts in the shop wherein you'll see a bible verse.

In September 2014, a dream business family came into reality. After one year they decided to build another branch which is in Biñan. It is said that it is for the conveniency of the students and regular customers near the place. Basically, this shop is just designed by the owner. (Well at first you might think that they hire an interior designer for this shop because of the cool concept they have, but NO!)

Bullets over Broadway

The First Act

The film began with a setting in New York City wherein, David Shayne (John Cusack) was arguing with Julian Marx (Jack Warden), a film producer, about the budget of the paly that David wanted to create. David is an idealistic young playwright, who's willing to deal with any offers as long as it is for his success. He's willing to compromise for the love of his art. Since budget is the reason why they can't continue to  make the play, Julian finally found funds from Nick Valenti (Joe Viterelli), a gangster. The catch is to make Nick's girlfriend Olive Neal (Jeniffer Tilly) one of the stars in the project they're going to produce. Olive's role is a psychiatrist, a woman with shrill voice and definitely untalented. She is not even pass for a psychiatrist as well as being a dreadful actress. Basically, she's just a woman that will aggravate you everytime she started speaking. What more when she stated throwing lines with her co-stars? Together with Olive is her bodyguard, Cheech, played by Chazz Palmiteri who's always following her in ever thing she do. Cheech will soon reveal his role in this film later on. He's not just Olive's bodyguard, he got more to say in the project David is directing.

Meanwhile, a fading star who has an alcohol problem and describe herself as "some vain Broadway legend", Helen Sinclair played by Dianne Wiest who's target is to seduce David. David has a longtime girlfriend Ellen (Mary-Louise Parker) who supports him all the way. The leading man in the project was played by Warner Purcell (Jim Broadbent) who has eating disorder problem. As they started setting up for the rehearsals they will encounter different challenges.

The setting of this film focused on the theater wherein they rehearse the play.

The Second Act

Since the project they are making is by the help of Nick with a deal to make his girlfriend, Olive as one of the star. They encounter challenges that makes their project worse. Most of the artists didn't know how to portray the roles tat are given to them. Plus Olive with a poor acting skills, it makes David irritated a lot but he doesn't have any choice because it will not be produced unless Olive is part of the play. What makes the movie intense is when Cheech interrupts one of their rehearsals and voice his opinion about the story of the play. David, at first is not in favor on Cheech's opinion. Every rehearsals gets even worse. Later on he realized that he should agree with Cheech's suggestions because this can help them solve the problem. 

One night after the rehearsal, Olive got a chance to talk to Warner. They soon discovered that they are sexually attracted to each other. As what the gangster, Nick asked to Cheech that he must always look and follow Olive, Cheech began suspecting that Olive and Warner are having an affair. Until one time in Olive's dressing room they were about start teasing each other sexually, Nick and his bodyguards knock and the door. Warner immediately hide on the closet so Nick didn't caught them.